Huge Update

Sooo much has been going on and I can't get motivated to work, so I'll sneak this update in.

Chad and I are not together anymore, since the beginning of the month. No more details on that here.

The kids and I have a great little apartment and we're adjusting okay. This is hard! Haleigh's been acting out a little more, but she's been through some big changes and hey, she's almost 3 years old so I guess that's to be expected. Hayden is my little sumo wrestler... 13lbs 2oz and 24 inches tall at just 2 months old. He's about ready to sit up at the table and eat with us. I'm still exclusively nursing/pumping for him and I'm so freaking proud that he's so healthy and it's all from me.

If you know a single mom, send her flowers or call her and tell her she's doing a great job, because this is the hardest thing I've ever done. Emotionally, physically, mentally, it is so draining. I feel horrible because I watch the clock in the evening, just waiting for 7:30 so Haleigh can go to bed and I can sit down for two minutes. She is a ball of energy and I feel like I'm failing because I just can't keep up with her some nights. And I've always got something on my mind, a grocery list or planning a meal, because the responsibility is all on me. I have to make sure she gets dinner and a bath, I have to get her up in the morning, clean, dressed, breakfasted and out the door on time. I have to make sure I have baby tylenol because I can't just run out and grab some when Hayden is sore and cranky from his shots. I used to run my errands at night after they'd go to bed and now I have to be creative in when I go to the bank, or pick up a few groceries.

I'm a little stressed! And my milk supply is apparently affected by stress. So is my hair and its ability to stay on my head! And why is Hayden getting up at 4am now?